Cereal and Tomatoes

A couple weeks ago I did my usual Monday night fitness class then ran on the beach the next morning with a lady from class.  I wanted to try running in the sand with no shoes on for a short distance, but I underestimated how close we were to the end.  I ended up running at least half a mile barefoot carrying my shoes.  Not fun.  I won’t be doing that again and I definitely won’t be getting any of those minimalist shoes!   

At the end of the run I was HUNGRY!  I was determined to not get McDonald’s or any other fast food, so I was trying to think of what was available on my way home.  Ah, a grocery store!  I didn’t expect there to be too many cars in the parking lot at 7:00 a.m., but the reason there were hardly any is because they don’t open until 7:30.  :-(  

The only other place on the way home was Walmart.  The one I pass is not a Supercenter so the selection of groceries was limited.  I walked down a couple aisles not knowing what I wanted but quickly ruled out crackers, granola candy bars, and stuff like that.  There was no fresh food.  On the cereal aisle I saw

Chocolate strawberry cereal?!?!?!?!  Oh yeah!  And it’s Special K?  That’s better than Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs!  Moderation, of course.  I didn’t plan to nor did I eat the whole box.  I saw it as God having something special just for me because I honored Him by not putting junk in my body.  I ate some straight out of the box on the way home but didn’t pig out.  

 

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Yesterday I went tomato picking. 

 

Some of the tomatoes were riper than others and some looked good until I turned them over and saw a rotten spot on the bottom or back.  What was interesting is that even if the tomato was on the ground,

which would seem like a not-very-ideal spot for it to grow resting on the plastic (fake) tarp and surrounded by weeds, if it was still attached to the vine it was usually good with no bad spots.  The bad tomatoes I left on the ground or even smooshed with my foot.  I threw one at my daughter after she threw one at me!  (just at each other’s feet)  They were useless for me to put in my bag, pay for, and bring home to use for their intended purpose. 

John 15:4-8  ⁴Remain in me, and I will remain in you.  For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.

⁵ “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches.  Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit.  For apart from me you can do nothing.  ⁶ Anyone who does not remain in me is thrown away like a useless branch and withers.  Such branches are gathered into a pile to be burned.  ⁷ But if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted!  ⁸ When you produce much fruit, you are my true disciples.  This brings great glory to my Father.

Even in undesirable circumstances, if we stay connected to the Vine we can be fruitful.  :-)

I'm Getting There!

At the end of my last blog post I asked if you thought that next time I’d go 35 minutes in one direction before turning around. 

Raise your hand if you thought I would.  You win, because I did! 

I took the same course except for a little correction to start on the right street, on the north side of the park and not the south side.  Oops.  I think I still need to correct another part.  I run on the same side of the bridge out and back, but I think the actual course comes back on the other side.  My way takes safety into account but with vehicle traffic banned from the course they can do things a little differently on race day.  In my last post I had two pictures of the bridge that I couldn’t get side by side so you could see how big it is.  My friend Doug melded the two together for me so you can get a better idea of the length and height of this bridge I run twice two days a week.  Thanks, Doug!

I ran for 35 minutes, almost to the turnaround point for the actual race, then turned around and went back.  I ran for a total of 40 minutes, which is my usual running time, and then walked for 4 minutes.  I’m a little disappointed about that, but I started the race hungry and battled that all the way through.  I then ran some, walked a few more minutes, ran, walked, etc.  I walked for a total of probably 10 minutes.  I made sure I ran the entire bridge, though!  I have to earn the fun downhill and I do that by running the uphill. 

I traveled 2.7 miles in one direction and then back for a total of 5.4.  I’m getting there!  I know I may have to walk part of the distance on race day, and that’s okay.  I’d like to run the whole thing, but it’s okay if I don’t.  As long as I run the entire bridge both times, that is!  I finished the course in 1:13:54, which is about 13:30 per mile.  A little slower than I’d like but, again, that’s okay.  I’m running.  Period. 

I think I’m going to run the course again on Monday, so I’ll let you know how that goes.  Will I go 40 minutes in one direction?  If I continue to run the course twice a week and increase by 5 minutes each time, I can be running the entire thing by December 7.  When I think about that I get a nail-biting, I-don’t-know-about-this feeling like I probably had when I registered for my very first race without being able to run the whole thing at that time.  And that was an easy 3.1 miles!  Look how far God has brought me!  I did run the full distance about a week before race day, though, just like this will be (I hope). 

I know I need to eat a better meal the night before a long run.  I had a big lunch yesterday and a small supper, which is what I prefer in general (eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and supper like a pauper), but which doesn’t work too well when I’m pushing my body beyond its limits.  Live and learn. 

Okay, I interrupted composing this post to actually register for the race.  Exciting!  I have an exercise jar (actually a piggy bank) into which I put a dollar each time I run or otherwise exercise. 

I took $19 out of it to pay the fee.  I’m committed now! 

One of the songs on my playlist is the Veggie Tales song about knocking down the walls of Jericho that I adapted to my running:  “Keep running…and I will knock down that wall!  Keep running…and I am not gonna fall!  It’s plain to seeeeeee my God is very big, so keep running…I will be knocking down that wall!”  I think for this race I want friends or family members stationed somewhere along the route with a paper banner of a brick wall and the words “I Can’t” on it.  As I run by I’ll break through the banner!  That sounds like fun! 

Once again, my friend Doug came through for me.  I googled pictures of brick walls but don't know how to add words to an image.  I made a brick wall texture background in Word and added "I Can't" to it but it wouldn't copy to this blog.  I asked Doug for help and he sent me this picture.  Um, that's quite a wall, there, Doug.  Thank you. 

I Keep Learning

I thought I was hungry, so I took a bowl of beans and rice out of the fridge to heat up.  As I walked to the microwave I took a bite of ham that was sitting on top of the rice.  I immediately knew that what I was feeling was not physical hunger so I put the bowl back in the fridge and am eating nothing. 

I don’t need it.  I thought I did in order to keep working this evening and to fuel my run in the morning, but I guess I don’t.  God is still teaching me how to deny myself. 

I think my lack of progress in increasing my running time is directly related to my weight loss being at a standstill.  If I could lose another good amount of weight, I might get faster.  Over the last couple weeks I noticed that the Olympic runners were almost all super thin.  Don’t get the wrong idea!  I’m not going to starve myself or take any supplements nor am I saying anyone should do that to get a certain look.  It’s just an observation I had.  I hope their leanness is a result of good nutrition and training.  I’m not training for the Olympics.  Maybe realizing that bite of ham was not what I needed is God telling me to trust Him with fueling my body.  Maybe I don’t need to eat as much as I think I do.  Maybe I’ll eat a little bit after I wake up and before I run in the morning.  Maybe not.  We’ll see.  I just know I don’t need anything tonight, and I realized it before I ate the entire bowl of beans and rice. 

Three Years and Counting

Today is three years since I started The Lord’s Table, the online Bible study that has helped me lose 81 pounds and was the biggest catalyst in changing the way I think about food. 

I had already started losing weight without realizing it.  One day I just became aware of the fact that for a couple months I hadn’t been eating as much food and had lost some weight.  I was clueless as to why I wasn’t eating as much but happy to have the loss, of course!  Later that year, I was boasting to a friend about my self-control in having McDonald’s for breakfast only 2 days out of 3. 

He told me about The Lord’s Table at www.SettingCaptivesFree.com.  I looked at it for a few days, decided to sign up, and the rest is history!  Except that it’s not only history; it was just the beginning and even three years later it’s the present.  I’m not doing that specific study any longer, but the truths about God I learned in that course still figure prominently in my decisions today and will for the rest of my life. 

In a nutshell, I was fat and didn’t want to be but thought it was inevitable and linked to genetics.  Surely the effort I was making should count for something.  Not eating the last bite of a sandwich…once…a month…should result in weight loss.  I’M TRYYYYYIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNGGGG!!!!!!

Ahem.  I think that red backpack was full of snacks and drinks in case we got lost in the corn maze. 

No, I wasn’t really trying, I discovered.  Through The Lord’s Table I learned that overeating is sin (which I repented of) and that I hadn’t been trusting God to give me what I need when I need it.  I had been getting it for myself.  Way too much of it (which I also repented of).   I’m typing this blog and eating lunch at the same time.  An hour and 15 minutes ago I had some leftover Smoked Mozzarella Chicken from Olive Garden, but I'm feeling hungry again.  I went to the fridge and got the leftover salad from Olive Garden.  I started to walk back into my office and heard God say, “You don’t need all of that.”  I went back into the kitchen, got a small bowl, and put about a third of the salad into it.  That’s what I’m eating now.  I call this feeling like Gideon.  In Judges 7, Gideon starts out with 32,000 warriors under his command, but God starts whittling his army down until he gets to 300 and then God says He will give Gideon victory over his enemies with just the 300 soldiers. 

Ummm…God?  I had 32,000 calories at my disposal.  [Figuratively, of course.  Stay with me; it’ll make sense in a minute.]  You’re telling me to eat just 300?  How can I possibly sustain myself on just 300 calories???  God answers, “You won’t.  I’ll sustain you.  I’ll cause your enemies to fight among themselves and I’ll give you the victory.”  My enemies, the world’s wisdom when it comes to weight loss, often contradict themselves.  A study comes out claiming that this food is the key to permanent weight loss.  Soon another study comes out debunking the previous one and claiming that this rare supplement found only in a 1-square mile area of the Andes Mountains is the key to permanent weight loss.  You know how it goes.  Situps are the key to a flat tummy!  No, planks are the key to a flat tummy!  No, lift weights so that you build muscle and burn fat even when you’re resting!  Sure, there’s a little bit of truth in all those claims, but do you see how they’re fighting against each other?  Some foods are good for weight loss when they’re substituted in place of another food, planks are fine (I do them regularly), and strength training does build muscle so that I burn fat even when resting.  That’s why men generally lose weight faster than women; they have more muscle that’s constantly burning fat.  Sometimes I start thinking that a new revelation (or an old one packaged in a new way) will be my key, so I start researching it, but then I find contradictory information.  I start researching that and find something that contradicts them both.  It’s ridiculous! 

So how do I make sense of it all?  This past Sunday I re-read one of my favorite weight loss Scriptures, Colossians 2:20-23.  “You have died with Christ and He has set you free from…this world.  So why do you keep on following rules of the world such as, ‘Don’t handle, don’t eat, don’t touch!’  Such rules are mere human teaching…These rules may seem wise because they require strong devotion, humility, and severe bodily discipline, but they have no effect when it comes to conquering a person’s evil thoughts and desires.”  The world's methods work only on the outside, or rather, only on the body.  God's method gets to the heart of the matter.  "Are you going to trust Me, the One who made you, about what's best for you?  Are you going to obey Me when I tell you to do something?"

So the end of chapter 2 tells us what NOT to do, but are we TO do?  Keep reading in chapter 3.  “…set your sights on the realities of Heaven…let Heaven fill your thoughts.  Don’t think only about things here on Earth.” 

That’s what I did 35 minutes ago when I heard God tell me to eat only part of the salad and I obeyed. 

In the three years since starting The Lord’s Table, I’ve lost 81 pounds. 

I had lost 90 by this past January, but I’ve gained back 9.  I’d like to skip that part and just let you think it’s been all loss with no gains or plateaus but that would be deceiving you.  There have been a couple gains, this 9 pounds being the biggest one, and plenty of plateaus.  It’s been slow going, but that’s okay.  I recently realized why the weight loss has slowed.  For the past 1-1/2 years I’ve been concentrating on fitness, not just weight loss.  I started running (yes, running!) and love it!  You’d think that would help me lose more weight, but actually the days I run I’m VERY hungry.  I don’t overeat or gorge myself, but I do eat more on those days than on nonrunning days.  I’m trying to curb that.  (See Colossians 3:1-3 above.)  I think that if I stopped running I could consistently eat less and possibly lose weight faster, but I don’t want to stop running.  I enjoy it too much to stop!  I enjoy the increased fitness and challenging my body and my mind.  I’m constantly learning new things and tweaking what I do, though, so we’ll see.  I am conscious of the tendency to eat more on running days and am reining it in. 

So, to summarize, three years ago GOD, the past 1095 days GOD, today GOD, and tomorrow GOD. 

Simple as that.

Voluntary Athletic Agony

Usually I fast supper on Saturday and breakfast and lunch on Sunday and eat again at 5:00.  That gives me time to get my energy built back up to run Monday morning.  This past Saturday, though, I intended to fast lunch and supper and just breakfast on Sunday because we had lunch at Sonny’s BBQ planned with immediate and extended family.  I didn’t want to fast lunch and supper on Saturday, though.  I wanted to eat.  It wasn’t a direct command from God, so I felt justified in modifying it to a liquid day.  Besides, I had smoothie left from Friday and figured I should use it up.  However, I didn’t just drink smoothie.  I ate a little bit of cheese and crackers too. 

A couple weeks ago I made up 80-calorie snack-size baggies of roasted, unsalted almonds to keep in my purse in case I got hungry and needed a quick snack.  Some of you may remember this picture I put on Facebook.

As I walked into church yesterday morning having had only smoothie for breakfast but plenty of it, I had the thought that I could have one of those bags of almonds.  I countered with, “But I’m not hungry.”  Within SECONDS I felt hunger.  I started to text a friend and tell her that old thoughts were attacking, but God interrupted and told me I needed to talk to Him first, so I went to the altar and prayed.  I told him I knew I didn’t NEED those almonds and asked him to help me resist them.  When I got back to my seat I took them out of my purse and put them in my daughter’s backpack so I’d have to ask her for them.  That would put an extra step in the process of getting to them and extra time for me to think about whether I really needed them or not.  (I just realized they’re still in her backpack 24 hours later!)  I finished texting my friend and told her that I need to honor God whether I have old thoughts or new ones. 

She texted back saying, “Satan has got our old number, doesn’t he?”  I love that imagery!  He sure does have my old number, but I don’t answer that phone anymore!  I actually do have an old phone that I never got rid of when I got my new one a few months ago. 

Once or twice a week I get a call on it, but I don’t answer it.  Actually, I never even hear it ring because I’ve turned the volume all the way down.  In the same way, I need to turn the volume on my old thoughts all the way to silent, like I did yesterday morning.  I don’t answer that cell phone anymore, and I got rid of my home number.  When satan calls that number he should hear, “You have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service.” 

I have a new number, literally and figuratively.  The longer I refuse to answer that literal old number and don’t use that phone, the fewer calls I get on it.  So it is with my figurative old number. 

We’re studying through 1 Timothy on Sunday mornings.  Chapter 6 verses 11-12 say, “You, [Michele] belong to God; so run (!) from all these evil things, and follow what is right and good.  Pursue a Godly life, along with faith, love, perseverance, and gentleness.  Fight the good fight for what we believe.  Hold tightly to the eternal life that God has given you, which you have confessed so well before many witnesses.” 

Our pastor said that the phrase “hold tightly” gives the picture of voluntary athletic agony.  Boy, do I know about voluntary athletic agony!  J  I need to be willing to be in agony if necessary as I fight this good fight, as I was and did yesterday morning when I resisted eating the almonds.  I endure the agony of aching feet and lungs because I know the end result is worth it.  I endure the agony of a stomach and taste buds that are calling for food they don’t need as I deny them what isn’t good for them, or at least not necessary at that time, because I know the end result of obedience to God is worth it. 

Another Revelation

I felt bloated and hungry at the same time, but stuck it out for well over an hour.  Then I ate ice cream with strawberries.  I didn't think to measure the ice cream; I just scooped some into a bowl then sliced 5 or 6 strawberries to mix in with it.  While I was eating it, my brother texted me and we started having a fun conversation.  Before I knew it I had finished the ice cream, even drinking the last bit that had melted.  I now feel not just bloated but FAT.  L  I decided to go rinse the rest down the drain.  This isn’t the first time I’ve rinsed ice cream down the drain.  Or the second.  Or even the third.  I’m seeing a pattern here.  It’s not a good idea for me to keep ice cream in the house.  When I’m out, I don’t feel a need to get ice cream.  In fact, I honestly can’t remember the last time I had ice cream out.  It’s been YEARS.  The only reason this was here is that my daughter and her friend made fried ice cream last week and this was left over. 

When David sinned with Bathsheba, one thing that led to his downfall is that he was not where he was supposed to be.  He should’ve been at war with his troops.  I should’ve been at work.  It’s now 9:30 at night and I have at least another hour of work to do.  I didn't need that ice cream to ensure my continued survival.  I could've had nothing. 

I want to say, “Live and learn.  Learn from this, brush it off, and move on.”  This is starting to be recurrent, though.  It’s not enough to brush it off and move on.  I don’t know what else I could’ve done differently.  Earlier this evening I did wait and the hungry feeling persisted so I thought it was real.  Maybe it was.  I don’t know what I could’ve had instead.  No, I do.  I could’ve put some thought into it and come up with a better snack than ice cream.  I don’t have a grocery store in my house, but I do have enough things that I could’ve made a better choice. 

I just prayed and asked God to forgive me.  I’m starting over right now.  Not tomorrow morning.  Certainly not next Monday.  Obviously I don’t need to eat anything else tonight.  Tomorrow’s breakfast will be my usual steel-cut oats with homemade yogurt and strawberries. 

Emotional Eating?

Tortilla chips came as a side with the soft tacos I had for supper.  I ate a few along with my meal but then got full so I brought the rest home.  I thought I was hungry again a couple hours later, so I started munching them as I checked email, Facebook, and Pinterest.  As I was wrapping that up I realized I was thinking, “Okay, take several of the broken ones so you can get a good mouthful before you start working.” 

That, my friends, is emotional eating. 

That’s not eating to satisfy hunger or to fuel my body. 

I used to say that I didn’t eat emotionally, and I still don’t think I eat in response to anger or sadness or anything like that.  Boredom, yes, or at least used to, but is boredom an emotion?  It might be a stretch to say it is.  I don’t know what emotion I was feeling when I had the above thought, but I know I didn’t NEED those tortilla chips.  I closed the box and put it in the kitchen.  Maybe I’ll have them tomorrow if they’re not stale and if I’m hungry. 

Day 9 - Monday

Down 0.2 pounds from yesterday and 10.2 pounds from the beginning. 

I sometimes miss running.  Now (Tuesday morning) I want to get back to it. 

I’ve known for several days that my first meal after the fast will be BBQ.  I want meat.  Smoked meat.  With a little sauce.  I’m not too concerned about the sides.  I just want meat. 

8:45 a.m.  Hungry now but have enacted 1-hour rule.

I miss eating.  I miss chewing. 

Glad to have Dee joining me!  My friend Dee started this same fast today.  Follow her blog at http://dee-lightfullmoments.blogspot.com/

Quotes from A Hunger for God  by John Piper

“…we are less sensitive to spiritual appetites when we are in the bondage of physical ones.” 

“I want the manifestation of You Yourself more than I want food.”

Day 4

This will be short because it's late and I'm tired. 

I found a packaged fortune cookie in my mom's car.  I wasn't going to eat it but just in case, I decided to throw it away.  Just throwing it in the trash bag as it was, though, I could've easily taken it out and eaten it.  I considered throwing it out the window, but that would be littering.  I ended up crumbling it in the package, but that still wouldn't have made it impossible to eat.  I then opened the package and sprinkled it in the trash bag.  Then all danger of eating it was gone!  :-)

Down 1 pound from yesterday and 5.6 from the beginning. 

Starting to desire (not crave) Taco Bell and toast.  Taco Bell is not my favorite.  Toast is fine, but not something I have all the time and it’s not a big deal when I do have it.  Hmmm.

I don’t miss chocolate, surprisingly.

I want to eat raw bread dough.  Or cooked, like garlic knots from Little Italy. 

I realized I wasn't really letting myself get very hungry.  I've decided to enact a 1-hour rule.  When I feel hunger, I'll wait 1 hour before eating, well drinking. 

The War Is Already Won

When my dad and I were in the ER waiting room last night I was very hungry.  We got the call that they were taking my mom there just before we sat down to supper and it was now an hour after that, so about 7:00.  After a while of sitting there thinking about how hungry I was, I remembered that there were vending machines behind me.  The thought of getting something from them, though, was gross.  It actually turned my stomach.  A couple years ago I would've known that it wasn't a good choice but I would've tried to make the best of it somehow.  Whole-grain Sunchips maybe?  A granola bar? 

Well last night I didn't get anything.  Neither the food nor the drink machine tempted me.  It wasn't that I fought a battle and won; the battle, no the war, has already been won!  Woo!  I didn't even have to fight.  I just stood (or sat) in the victory that was already mine.  How peaceful!

I still owe y'all the rest of the race report.  I've been so swamped lately with my mom's injury and hospitalization and taking care of Brianne, my dad, and all the household stuff for them.  Since I'm on here anyway, I might as well do it now. 

We started running the race and got into a decent pace.  People were passing us, but that was okay.  I WAS RUNNING THE RACE!!!  A little bit after the 1-mile mark I saw the first person I recognized since starting.  He was holding up his phone to take a picture of me and I hollered, "I'm doing it!"  I was almost giddy!  Soon after that I saw my daughter who took a few pictures and encouraged me to keep going.  That made me happy too!  Then we didn't see anyone we knew until the very end. 

We continued on the course, which we knew very well from all our practice runs.  As we neared the end I started hearing music and seeing people I recognized.  Melisa and I had worked some on having a strong finish, but it's very difficult to push at the end when you're so tired.  Seeing people I knew, though, and hearing them cheer for me, FOR ME!!, energized me!  Two friends who had already finished came back and ran across the finish line with us.  That was fun!  I picked up my pace and practically sprinted to the finish!  I posted a few days before the race some tips for spectators.  One of them mentioned being specific in your cheering.  "Yep, it is nice to hear “ohgoodjob” but lemme tell you it is so much more fun to hear “OH HERE SHE COMES, JEN JEN JEN, OVER HERE! WAHOO!!!! KEEP RUNNING, OH MY GOSH YOU ARE DOING IT! WAHOOOOOOOO!!! JEN KEEP RUNNING!!! I LOVE YOU!” No lie. Go all out. Your 30 seconds of screaming will carry me an entire mile. I will float on your cheers, puff my chest out and let your cheers be my fuel." 

I found out how true that is!  Seeing and hearing my friends cheering FOR ME gave me energy I never knew I had!  Thank you to everyone who was part of that!

Here are some more pictures:

Before leaving for the race.  I'm so nervous I'm already sweating!

Close up of the shirt I wrote on.  Thank you, Kendall!  I wrote on the purple one too and took it along to change into afterward because I knew I'd be sweaty, but there was such a strong breeze I didn't have to.

 I'm running so fast you can't even see me!

Here we come!

There we go!

My dad and me after the race.

Gotta get to work now.  Thank you to everyone who has prayed for and encouraged me.  Keep it up!  I'm still running!  This was only the first of many(?) more races to come!

I can't do this without help. And I'm not. :-)

I took yesterday off from my jog. It stormed when I would've run anyway. Today I did 2 sections plus 110 steps, almost another complete section. On one section I was thinking about things and went to almost 120 steps! And as I approached another I looked ahead and prepped myself by saying, "Jog one, jog two, plus 180." 180????????!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah, that's what I said to myself!

Sometimes I wonder why I do this because, honestly, I don't like the process of jogging and I definitely don't like sweating.  What I like are the results of jogging and of pushing myself (gently) beyond what I think I'm capable of.  Clearly, I'm meant to continue jogging and not stop.  Maybe I'll even expand beyond 3.1 miles when these three 5Ks are over (but you didn't hear that from me!  Not yet, anyway!)

Unrelated to that, I was at my mom and dad's house and decided to see what was in their fridge.  Today is a liquid day for me with one solid meal, which I already had.  But I was hungry.  There was a bucket of KFC chicken and (this all happened in less than a second) I fully intended to get a piece.  Just as quickly as I made that decision, I smelled it.  Even though it wasn't rotten, the smell just...got to me.  And I heard a voice say, "No, you won't." 

So I didn't.  But I'm still hungry.  Matthew West is on the radio right now singing The Motions, one of the songs that helped me through my 20-day fast.  I have a line from that song on one of my workout T-shirts, "I don't want to spend my whole life asking, 'What if I had given everything?' instead of going through the motions."

Help me continue to resist, God. 

Battling The Flesh

The last week or so has been very "light" spiritually. I miss my heavy spiritual days. I feel distant from God and heavy and bloated physically. I've been feeling hungry a lot lately so I've eaten more. Small amounts at a time but probably more overall. I just don't have time in my schedule to plan sit-down meals or meals at all. We have food but not meals. I'm missing sleep, but that's nothing new. I'm looking forward to next week when I'll have some time off from work for the homeschool convention and just in general. SLEEP!  

I remember back when I had the most success with losing weight. It was when I was relentless in denying my flesh. I got tired of that and thought I could loosen up a little. I guess I can't. Yesterday I decided to stretch my denying time to two hours after I first feel hungry. I'm going to read back over old posts, blogs, journal entries, and Bible verses to rekindle the spark I used to have.

I need more of Jesus and less of Michele!

My flesh is a spoiled brat that needs to be told "NO" more often!

Earlier this evening (after 7) I fixed spinach salad for supper.  Spinach leaves, chicken, and hard-boiled egg.  I had two small bowls of it even though today was one of my half-portion days.  Around 8:45 or 9:00 I started getting hungry and wanting more.  I almost got some, rationalizing that it was salad, and very simple salad at that, not my usual salad with about 10 ingredients.  It was GOOD for me, doncha know?  Then I remembered my guideline of waiting 1-1/2 hours after feeling hunger before eating.  This helps me keep my flesh under control and be sure the hunger I'm feeling is really my body calling for fuel.  So I wrote 10:30 on a piece of paper next to where I'm working.  That's when I'll have some more salad.  It's 10:10 now - 20 minutes to go.  I'm not ravenously counting down the minutes, but I do look at the clock occasionally. 

I hope this encourages you that (1) I still battle with my flesh.  I haven't arrived at perfection. (2)  Flesh CAN be brought into submission.  Galatians 5:16 (NLT) - ¹⁶ So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves.

10:25 - My eyes see the clock and tell my stomach, "Only 5 more minutes!"  My bratty stomach says, "If I can make her feel exhausted (really, a feeling of complete exhaustion came over me), maybe she'll cut it short by a few minutes!"    HA!  But I'm too smart for them now!  I said 10:30 and 10:30 it shall be! 

10:34  - Been working but getting up now to get a small bowl of salad. 

10:50 - I fixed a bowl of salad.  I measured another one in the set and the bowl holds 16 ounces.  I ate about 2/3 of it,then realized that was plenty.  I'm done.  I'm in charge.  Me and the Holy Spirit in me.  Not my flesh.  Aaaaahhhhh!!!!!  This feels good!  : )